I’ve been sick for almost a week and very tired for longer than that leading up to the actuality of feeling not-well. It’s interesting because I am certain of few things, but one of them is that the body talks to us. I know that viruses and bacteria are real, but I don’t see clients coming down with illnesses unless they are previously impaired in some physical, mental or emotional way. Stresses arise so regularly in the daily hustle that we can end up unaware of our deep need for down time to settle back into our Selves.
I have been racking my brain, when I perhaps should have been consulting my heart, trying to decide what has landed me here. I am feeling incredibly sore and sweaty with a rapid pulse and none of my usual ‘sick’ symptoms. It’s feels like fire, like transformative fire. I am finding myself mantra-ing, “everythings already alright, always alright” and it feels like the depths of my fears are being pulled from my achy joints. These ideas of not enough, of failure, of can’t have/do/be what I’m meant to be are being purged. And it’s not pretty but it’s beautiful, ya know?
We are about to embark on a change as a family that is moving us much closer to nature. This feels huge. And I guess in order to move forward, I’ve got to leave some of this cargo I’ve outgrown behind.
That’s what it’s feeling like to be not well over here today.
Mantra credits: Nahko Bear and Medicine for the People